After about a quarter of an hour past the time we where to have left we happened to glance out of the plane window...It was the marinated man helped (or dragged) by two pilots.. and yes the place next to me was for the marinated man, and his plan was evidently to keep on marinating himself, he was armed with a can of beer... All the stewardess took turns removing cans from him, but it was as he had some kind of magical coat. Every time he lost a beer he managed to bring a new can from some new pocket. I did try to make him take it easy on the drink but somehow my words failed to reach him. At last his constant beer drinking he had to make a trip to the toilet. He managed a pretty good walk but in trying to place the can of beer on his seat failed miserably, it hit his seat perfectly upside down, soaking it completely. I managed to pick up the can but the damage was done. I also failed to hinder him seating himself. It took about a minute for him to grasp the wetness of the seat, but he soon found comfort in a new can of beer, neglecting the state of his pants. We where very tired when we at last was let out of the plane and headed for the custom area. The last man to be led through customs was the marinated man, this time helped by two rather sturdy Spanish policeman (mark that this was before 911) While the rest of the travelers waited for our luggage, the marinated man sat down for a rest (not knowing it was part of the conveyor belt). From sitting there is not a long way to lying down, and soon the he was sleeping sweetly. It was only after the conveyor belt had started that we saw him, and before anyone of us could do something... he had disappeared into the dark underbelly of the airport.. After some time the marinated man resurfaced still sleeping serenely... But when the conveyor belt made a sharp turn he fell of the belt and was brutally awakened. The last we saw of the marinated man was we he sat with his bike outside of the airport, I gather that he was very scared of flying and therefor felt the need of marinating himself with alcohol.
Portrait of Sam Goldofsky by David Kassan
10 hours ago